Mary Welch Steinhoff Archives

April 16, 2023April 16, 2023

Chocolate Rabbits Visit the Cemetery

I had to smile while I was waiting in line to check out at Schnuck’s grocery store a couple of days ago. You know Easter has come and gone when the chocolate rabbits hop into the clearance basket.

Mother and Brother Mark would harvest as many of the rabbits they could find when they went on sale. The orphan bunnies shivered in the basement freezer until they were melted down for whatever purpose the pair could come up with.

April rains bring spring flowers

The gentle rains caused the tulips Mother planted decades ago to welcome Spring, but the next round of winds and rains whipped them to shreds before I could decorate Mother and Dad’s tombstone as was my usual custom.

I decided that chocolate bunny rabbits would make a good stand-in. I hurried to the grocery store and found that the cart still had an abundance of the hoppers.

Dad’s birthday was coming up

Chocolate rabbits for LV – Mary Steinhoff 04-15-2023

Dad died in 1977. If we populated his birthday cake on April 17 of this year, the 106 candles would be visible in outer space.

I thought he’d appreciate that I sampled the rabbit before delivering it.

Mother’s rabbit was fancier

I thought Mother deserved a fancier rabbit than Dad.

It’s fun coming up with something a little different to show them they have been remembered.

Unconventional grave decorations

Mother got pine cones in 2019.
A decades-old plastic Easter egg hiding amidst the tulips that she had planted a gazillion years ago showed up in 2016.
In 2015, she got the last rose of summer.
Some railroad spikes, a quarter squashed by a train, and a tiny blue ceramic floor tile from Cairo has showed up over the years.

November 11, 2022

New Flag for Veterans Day

American flags have always been a big deal in our family. When I was kindergarten age, I had a small flag that I would put out first thing every morning. I remember crying because we were late getting home one night and I was sure the Flag Police would arrest me for not bringing the flag in when it got dark.

Mother flew flag almost every day

Mother’s flag wasn’t all-weather, and it wasn’t lighted at night, so she only put it during the day when it was pretty. It provided the perfect backdrop when her kin came to visit.

What’s with the tattered flag?

I put a flagpole in the front yard and bought an all-weather flag that is is lighted at night. I noticed the other day that it was starting to fade, so I made a mental note to replace it before long.

I went out to South Carolina to spend a week with Son Adam and his family. When I got back to Cape, I could see that a strong wind storm must have come through because the tarp over my carport was in tatters.

A couple days later, I noticed that my flag had a small hole in it. By the time I got a replacement ordered, it had grown in size.

I’m going to put up the new flag on Veterans Day to mark the sacrifices that have made it possible for that flag to wave in my front yard.

I’m sure Mother would be happy to see her flag tradition continues.

December 26, 2021

Dad’s Boat in the Basement

1944 LV Steinhoff classified advertising

Every family has stories that may or may not be true. Dad often told a story about pulling his toy wagon full of sheet music for the woman who accompanied the silent movies at the Broadway theater.

We all dismissed that as his version of walking 12 miles to school in waist-deep snow (uphill both ways.)

Eventually, Mother sent me the obit of the woman who HAD played music at the silent movies. I guess he wasn’t just funnin’ us with his tale.

Dad and the basement boat

I don’t ever recall Dad mention the boat he built in the basement at Themis Street before discovering he couldn’t get it through the door. That strikes me as a story no man would tell on himself.

I was never able to determine if the tale was true, and all the folks I could ask are no long with us.

Then, I ran across a couple of Missourian classified ads from 1944. The one at the top of the page was to sell a new, 12-foot row boat; table top model radio, $25; electric jig saw, $10; and one 4 and one 6 cylinder magneto.

Maybe he HAD gotten the boat out of the basement, and maybe that’s why he was also able to sell the jig saw.

Bicycles for sale

About the same time, he was trying to sell two pre-war bicycles, like new. (And the boat.)

Mother with bikes

Mary Welch Steinhoff holds her bike and one belonging to L.V. Steinhoff in front of the garage in Advance, MO. They rode the bikes from Cape Girardeau to Advance shortly after they were married.

Decades later, she still talked about how their legs cramped up from the 36-mile ride.

The first year I started serious biking, I did the 72-mile round trip in their memory. I had quite a bit of long-distance cycling under my saddle by then – including at least one 100-mile day, so I fared better than they did.

Another bike photo

Mary Steinhoff and LV Steinhoff w Roy E Welch in background – Rolla MO 1942

Here’s Dad on a bike. Mother’s dad, Roy Welch, is looking through the screen door in the background.

I think that Advance ride dampened their enthusiasm for long two-wheeled expeditions.

November 29, 2021

Letters from Mother to Dad

I ran across some snippets of letter between Dad and Mother mixed in with business correspondence.

My parents weren’t particularly demonstrative (maybe that’s where I got it), but they conveyed their closeness in shared moments and glances.

This series was part of a photo book I put together documenting Christmas 1969.

A letter from Mother

Based on the fact that it’s on Markham and Brown stationary, this must have been written shortly after they were married. I’m not sure if she sent it to Dad or to her parents.

“I wish everyone could be as happy as I am all my life. I had most everything I wanted and now I still have what I want. I don’t see how it can last forever. I am twice as happy as I ever expected…”

Mother buries the lead

Newspaper writers constructed their scribblings in what was called the “inverted pyramid” style, meaning that the most import elements were at the top, making it easy for an editor to trim from the bottom if space was tight.

If you put the important thing at the bottom, it was caused “burying the lead (spelled lede in journalistic jargon). Friend Jan says I’m bad about doing that.

Anyway, in this undated letter to Dad, Mother lists all kinds of mundane things she had taken care of, then, in her buried lede, she says, “Thank you for a nice day. So glad you made me a mother. Love MLS.”

Making memories

In 2012, I discovered this frame.

I wrote, “I don’t remember taking it, probably because the moment didn’t mean as much to me then as it does now. I often say that some days you make pictures; other days you make memories. This was one of those cases when I’m glad I made a photograph that lets me fill in a memory that I DIDN’T make at the time.”

That’s one of the shared moments I mentioned in the lede.