The Circle Grows Smaller

Mary Steinhoff birthday 09-10-2001Mother called with shocking, though not totally unexpected news: Katy Proctor, one of her closest friends had died. She and her husband had been in ill health some time, but Mother and Katy still talked and visited fairly frequently.

In 2001, Brother Mark and I surprised Mother by renting a couple of stretch limos and taking her and her friends to a birthday dinner. We planned it for a month before her actual birthday so she wouldn’t expect anything. Katy and her husband, Woody, were part of the crowd.

The group decided they wanted to see and be seen in their limos. As they cruised down Broadway, throngs of people lined the street, and she thought that maybe the whole town had turned out to celebrate her birthday. It was actually spectators showing up for the SEMO Homecoming parade, but, what the heck.

There was some discussion about mooning the crowd, but the folks in MY limo were talked out of it. I can’t testify as to the behavior of the rowdy senior citizens in the other car.

Unfortunately, most of the people in this photo are no longer with us, something that makes Mother feel increasingly more isolated.

Katy’s obituary

KatieKathryn Revelle (Katy) Proctor passed away on Feb 24 2015 at Assisted Living West at the Lutheran Home.  She was born on November 23, 1920 at Hickory Ridge, Missouri to Melvin and Chlora McNeely Revelle.  She grew up in Delta and graduated from Delta High School.  She married Woodrow Proctor on June 7, 1941 at Oran, Missouri.  They lived at Chaffee until 1964 when they moved to Cape Girardeau.  She was cafeteria manager at Franklin School for 22 years. After her retirement she worked at Mothers Day Out at Lynwood Baptist church many years and volunteered at the Fish Food Pantry and SE Hospital Auxillary.

She is survived by her husband of 73 years, Woodrow Proctor, a son, David (Jeanie) Proctor of Nellysford, VA, a daughter, Brenda (John) Faris of Cape Girardeau. Five grandchildren, Stephen Faris (Jenny Weiss) of Cape Girardeau, Stuart (Megan) Faris of Webster Groves, Mo, Amy (Jack) Leachman of Asheville, NC, Andrea (Tarlton) Brewer of Richmond VA, and Kipp Proctor of  Bozeman, MT  and three great grandchildren Delia and Grady Faris of Webster Groves and Mary Grace Brewer of Richmond.  She is also survived by a sister, Audrey Kitchen of Union, Mo.

She was preceded in death by her parents, 6 brothers and 4 sisters.

Active in organizations

Mary Steinhoff - Katy Proctor 10-17-2003I did some newspaper searches several years back for some celebration Katy’s family had planned.

The November 9, 1961, Missourian had a society brief that The Fern Herrington Intermediate G.A.s of Calvary Baptist met at the church on Monday to study, under the guidance of their counselor, Mrs. Woodrow Proctor, the chapter on “Germany, A Nation Divided,” from the book, Teen Traveler Abroad.

Woody served in World War II

Katy and Woody Proctor at Mary Steinhoff BDay party 09-10-2001A brief in the August 6, 1945, Missourian said that Pfc. Ralph W. Proctor of Chaffee, a member of the 13th AAF Bomber Command in the Philippines, had been promoted to corporal in the Netherlands East Indies, according to a dispatch from headquarters overseas. Corp. Proctor, son of Mr. and Mrs. Joe Proctor, joined the service in December, 1942, and saw his first action with the veteran “Jungle Air Force” in June 1943, at Guadalcanal. His wife, Mrs. Kathryn Revelle Proctor, lives at Chaffee.


Mary Steinhoff-Katy Proctor 09-10-2001Mark and I were always amused at how the group of women were constantly squabbling and getting on the outs with each other, then reuniting like nothing had happened.

We’re going to miss her

Mary Steinhoff - Kary Proctor 10-17-2008_2216Katy had an infectious grin that wrapped all the way around face, she could talk a mile a minute, and break out laughing at the least little thing.

She was a good friend to Mother. We’re all going to miss her.





16 Replies to “The Circle Grows Smaller”

  1. Katy was a wonderful person. She kept going and going and I was amazed at her energy. She will be greatly missed.

  2. Ken,
    Thanks so much for this tribute to my mother and for many of these pictures that I had not seen. She was a remarkable person and touched many lives. It is sad that most of those friends in that picture are no longer with us. Those Senior citizens knew how to have fun and I think your mom could hold her own in the talking category. We will all miss her dearly, especially dad after 73 years of marriage to her.

  3. Brenda I am so sorry for you and Mike ‘s loss . Your Mommy was a very special lady , we know she is in a better place . Thoughts and prayers for your Daddy who is a special man and prayers for the family . RIP Katie

  4. I went to Franklin, and I remember Mrs. Proctor. It’s funny how you can go years without thinking of someone, then see an old picture, and Bam! the memories flood back. Mrs. Proctor was always so nice, and had a smile and kind word for the school kids. My condolences to her family and friends, God rest her.

  5. Ken,
    In an early post you stated you didn’t know how to spell Presidents’ Day correctly. You spelled it correctly. It’s in honor of 2 presidents (plural) and possessive, therefore, plural possessive.

  6. Thanks for your appropriate tribute to Ms Katie! This amazingly optimistic woman faced challenging situations with a smile and a “can do” spirit. She was always a friend and encourager, picking up our friendship where we left off, even when months and years began to separate the frequency of our paths crossings. She, and her circle of friends, modeled how we need to approach our senior years! Let the fun begin!!

  7. Katy and Woody were friends of my mother and dad, Helen and Frank Jones. They all attended First Baptist Church and shared many special memories. I had the pleasure of visiting with them Christmas of 2013 when my son’s Boy Scout class caroled at the Lutheran Home. At that time Katy and Woody were both still just as sharp and talkative as ever. They were some of the very last of my parents’ friends still around, part of that ‘Greatest Generation’ for sure!

  8. brenda, my sincere condolences. This is very lovely tribute to very lovely lady. My mother, Virginia Tierney, and her were very good friends, also. Fortunately my mother is one among her friends in the group picture still living. She is on poor health but so wishes your family her sympathy. The last time I saw Katy was about 18 years ago when she and Woody came to mom’s 70th birthday party. She was such a joy to have there, and I know she had a great time. God bless you and your entire family at this time of your loss and the days ahead. Praying for you.

  9. Kenny,
    My Mother, the same age as yours says, “The hardest part about living this long is all my friends are gone”. She has younger friends but says, “It’s just not the same”.

  10. Ken – Thank you so much for sharing this tribute to Katie and as well your mom. Calvin’s mom, Jeanne Brennan and all the ladies from their Sunday school classes were part of a life long group of friends who as you said “Were at odds one day and back hugging and talking the next” and their commitment to each other as true Christian friends. It amazed me her strength in the past years as she would hang out her laundry, rake leaves in the yard and tend to her flowers as well as keep an immaculate house. I have missed my “over the backyard fence” talks with Katy and Woody as well this past year. Katy will be missed by all who knew her and loved her…

  11. Such a sweet lady. Always welcomed me as a teenager, coming home with you Brenda. I know she’s in a better place, but I understand your loss. God bless.

  12. Ken, Loved the pictures of Katie and friends. My family moved to Cape in March 1967 and built a house behind the Proctors. I do remember when they found out 4 kids were moving in they put up a fence but that never bothered our friendship. They were there for my family through some tough times but also some very good times. They were the best and know Katie will be missed by many who knew her as well as her loving family. Loved the picture of she and Woody when they were pictured in the SE Missourian as being the longest married couple at the Schnucks Valentine celebration a year go. She will be missed by many. But good memories.

  13. My family built a house behind Katie and Woody in 1967 and have many wonderful memories of being neighbors through the years. I remember they put up a fence along our backyard when they found our 4 kids would be moving in but that fence was never a boundary for our friendship through the years. Some of those years were tough but more good ones and they were there for us. Katie was a special lady who influenced so many lives. May the memories be of her life help those who loved her help in their loss.

  14. I met Katie as the living grandmother of Dave and Jeanie Proctor’s children who attended my school. What a delight! Always a smile. Always an encouraging word to a newbie teacher just paddling upstream. Katie made everyone I know feel better about him- or herself.

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