I Smelt Up the House – Once

Fixing smelt 07-07-2023

When I was wandering around the freezer section in Schnucks the other night looking for something new to fix, I saw a frozen package of smelt that screamed that it was fresh caught and had a fresh taste.

I walked on.

On my next pass, I stopped a couple on the other side of the freezer case and asked if they had ever had smelt. The man said he had. He looked at the woman who was with him, and she nodded her head in the affirmative.

I should have asked if they had ever had it twice.

I solicited advice

Fixing smelt 07-07-2023

Wife Lila penned a query: “Publix has a special cooler for fish bait and the like. Are you sure you stopped at the right cooler?!?”

Foodie Jan Norris posted the question to her hive, which came back with some recipes. 

I followed one that told me to run cold water over the frozen fish just long enough to get the ice crystals off them, then roll them in a flour / salt / pepper concoction.

Didn’t want to risk it all at once

Fixing smelt 07-07-2023

I put a quarter of the quarter of the smelt I had extracted from the package into my air fryer basket.

(I didn’t want to take a chance on getting the whole batch wrong.)

I set the temp and timer

Fixing smelt 07-07-2023

I followed the directions to set the time and temp for 390 degrees and 10 minutes.

When I opened the pot, the fishies weren’t as crispy as I had hoped, so I gave them another four minutes.

I polished off that batch without being impressed.

I raised the temp to 400 and increased the time to 14 minutes for Batch Two. It was better, but I’d have been better off to have thrown them on my Blackstone griddle sans breading.

(Actually, I’d have been better off to have fed them to Phoebe the Bleeping Cat.)

The In-Laws get a gift

I called sister-in-law Marty. “I understand you’re going camping and fishing this weekend. I’m going to gift you something that might be an experiment, or it might be bait for Don.”

I presented them with a vacuum-sealed bag of what looked all the world like a bunch of headless minnows.

For the record, the fish lived up to their name: they smelt up my kitchen. They had a long lifespan, too. I had them for breakfast, and am still belching them 12 hours later.

 

 

Chocolate Rabbits Visit the Cemetery

I had to smile while I was waiting in line to check out at Schnuck’s grocery store a couple of days ago. You know Easter has come and gone when the chocolate rabbits hop into the clearance basket.

Mother and Brother Mark would harvest as many of the rabbits they could find when they went on sale. The orphan bunnies shivered in the basement freezer until they were melted down for whatever purpose the pair could come up with.

April rains bring spring flowers

Tulips at Kingsway Dr 04-02-2023

The gentle rains caused the tulips Mother planted decades ago to welcome Spring, but the next round of winds and rains whipped them to shreds before I could decorate Mother and Dad’s tombstone as was my usual custom.

I decided that chocolate bunny rabbits would make a good stand-in. I hurried to the grocery store and found that the cart still had an abundance of the hoppers.

Dad’s birthday was coming up

Chocolate rabbits for LV – Mary Steinhoff 04-15-2023

Dad died in 1977. If we populated his birthday cake on April 17 of this year, the 106 candles  would be visible in outer space.

I thought he’d appreciate that I sampled the rabbit before delivering it.

Mother’s rabbit was fancier

I thought Mother deserved a fancier rabbit than Dad.

It’s fun coming up with something a little different  to show them they have been remembered.

Unconventional grave decorations

  • Mother got pine cones in 2019.  
  • A decades-old plastic Easter egg hiding amidst the tulips that she had planted a gazillion years ago showed up in 2016.
  • In 2015, she got the last rose of summer.
  • Some railroad spikes, a quarter squashed by a train, and a tiny blue ceramic floor tile from Cairo has showed up over the years.

 

Bacon-Wrapped Shrimp

I saw a recipe for bacon-wrapped shrimp on the same day I spotted a Schnucks promotion for  seafood. I love shrimp, and I love bacon, so this was a good reason for me to put on my pants and venture out into the 106-degree heat index.

The picture shows the result. You can click on it to make it larger and to whet your appetite.

I don’t follow directions well

You can read the website’s ingredients and directions here.

Like I said, I take liberties with what people tell me to do. Where the recipe called for maple syrup, I substituted honey. I don’t particularly like maple syrup, and I thought the honey might stick better when I basted it on the shrimp and bacon.

I usually buy a thick bacon at Sam’s, and I’ve learned that it works best when I leave it in my convection toaster oven for 14 minutes at 400 degrees. I poured off the excess grease at about the half-way mark, and I increased the broiler time by two minutes to make the bacon a little crispier.

Finally, I didn’t have any off-the-shelf chili powder, so I reached for Wife Lila’s favorite, Chimayo Chile Bros Hatch Medium. It added enough heat that it was interesting, but not so much it overpowered the main ingredients.

I ate half the 20 medium-sized shrimp for supper, and polished the rest off for brunch. It was good enough that I’m going to make some more in the next couple of days.

Holiday Crisis Averted

I walked up to the young man stocking the soda shelves and said, “Kid, the fate of the Fourth of July is on your shoulders.”

I don’t know if Walmart employees are issued a panic button to push if confronted with “odd” customers, but the look in his eye made me believe he wished he had such a device.

“Here’s the deal. It’s not the Fourth of July unless I can pour strawberry soda over vanilla ice cream. I’d hate to have to tell all those folks who are waiting for fireworks to go off that you’re responsible for it not happening.”

He and a second stocker scoured the aisles and came back with the sad news: the Jackson Walmart had no strawberry soda in any brand.

(By the way, you can click on the images if you want to make them big enough to see the bubbles.)

Schnucks Saved the Day

Hoping to salvage the holiday, I went to Schnucks.

They, fortunately, had at least four brands of red soda on the shelves.

Cue up the firework displays. (For the record, this was taken in Middleport, Ohio, in 2015, while escorted by Curator Jessica, who is still young enough to get excited about things like this.)

After it was over, she asked how I liked it.

My answer was to play Peggy Lee singing Is That All There Is? 

More Fourth of July posts